Hello

Hello, to an unknowing foreigner might appear to be the Chinese people's favorite word because the excessive amount of times foreigners here it in a day. Though the laughter that generally follows the word might hint at the point of which it is being said. The Chinese people truly have a lack of understanding about how truly rude it is to a) assume every white person is American and can speak English and b) point out another person's heterogeneity.

We all know that children say and do very politically inappropriate things. I remember taking my neighbor's child to get ice-cream one summer and having her loudly ask "What's that?" about the prosthetic leg of the man in front of us. The story from a friend's mother telling me about her son's childhood obsession with midgets whom he referred to as "little guys." How he would point out midgets when ever he saw one. Or even myself, I've seen parents quickly hush their son or daughter when they point to my amputated finger and asks "What happened?" We teach our children young that it's impolite to point out a person just because they're different. I used to see this process as life but now I see it as culture, a part of my own culture I really appreciate.

In China instead of the parents cringing as their son or daughter points to the 外国人(waiguoren) or foreigner it's the parents tapping on their children's shoulders, pointing their faces in my direction, and saying it. Though "waiguoren" translates to foreigner it also means outsider, stranger, or even alien. Though the term is generally not meant to hurt it really is unfair. Though in America we are trained as children to accept everyone no matter how different they are as one of us in China young children are taught to look for difference and literally point it out. That's why, as I walk down the street each day I have to deal with people openly staring at me, pointing at me, and holding conversations right infront of me - about me. Sure, when you're in a foreign country it can be nice for people to notice your foreign and point you in the right direction but the truth is that most people are more willing to speculate about me than talk to me.

How do you respond? When you walk by a person who shouts out a distinctly Chinese "Hhhhhey-low" with a not to distant laughter. I cringe. They never had a parent to cringe for them and teach them that diversity is not something to point out or something to laugh about but that it's just part of life. But try telling that to a short, skinny, dark hair, dark eyed Chinese child who looks more or less like the other million people in China. That's what you're thinking isn't it? China is so homogenous, how can they understand diversity? But that's not it. Even in a sea of similarity Chinese people are albe to pick out the differences in one another. Women die their hair so it's a slightly lighter shade than other's. People wear very unique clothing to stand and of course you'd never want to be fat in China because that's the biggest difference of all. Slightly rounder faces belong to "village girls" as well as rosy cheeks. Where stalkier Chinese are "definitely from the south" and the tall ones "must be from the north." The markers go on and on including how oily your skin is, how many pimples you have, how wide your eyes open, and so on. It's honestly amazing that Chinese people see any similarities within themselves.

Though when I first got to China I had mostly pleasant responses - I would look and smile, now I do nothing. I keep walking and act like nothing has happened. My insides flare with my disgust and I try to suppress the urge to swear at them even though most of them don't grant me the same courtesy. Yes, it seams amazing that something like not responding to someone being rude, impolite, or even making fun of you can lead to their anger but in China that's normal. In my first week of being in China I was yelled an sworn at for turning my head away when someone tried to take a picture of me. Sometimes the response to me ducking photos is a more polite shy smile but often it's a very obnoxious giggle or full throttled conversation about the "waiguoren."

In many ways I feel like when children come up to me with a "Hello, how are you?"- one of the few phrases they learn in English- I should respond but in my head I sometimes think "then how will they learn?" How are these little kids - who mean no harm - supposed to grow up in to adults who don't think making fun of waiguoren is a fun pass time unless you don't acknowledge them? I'll smile at children and I'll wave. I make a lot of funny faces at kids in public - though mostly for self motivated reasons (to get them to stop crying). Many people say that being white in China is like being an ambassador. And I do want people to think well of foreigners, I do want to make a good impression but I don't think letting myself be made fun of is how I can accomplish this.